Nows the time

Social justice, two words that I feel can change the world. Recently I have been doing a lot of soul searching and decided now is the time for me to act on how I feel on this issue, time to get off my rear and do something. For as long as I can remember I have always had the desire to help others not caring about who they were or where they were from just help them and now that feeling has grown even more. I am tired of picking up a paper or watching the news and hearing how people treat each other or how we just feel that some people are disposable and the way to deal with them is throw them away or put them out of sight. Where is the justice in our own country? I recently read an article in S.I. that compared the life of an Ohio State football player and a homeless man in Columbus and it was just sickening to read the separation in how the two live. The homeless man sleeping in the cold getting up early just to get in line to take a hot shower and get something to eat, the football player waking up in a posh hotel room on game day driving his nice SUV to the stadium and being surrounded by all the luxuries you could want there including steak and chicken dinners. I understand that some will say they are both getting what they have earned but, how can we spend millions if not billions on something like college football and let our fellow humans sleep out in the cold and stand in long lines for a chance to have what we take for granted. So what will or can I do about it? I plan on getting more involved, getting the youth I work with more involved and doing everything I can to make people aware of what social justice means to me. So back to the S.I. article, this is not an indictment of college sports, there are many other areas that the same sort of waste occur and that is what bother me. What better place than our college campuses to teach about social justice and changing our world by just giving up a little of the luxuries we have. I know this seems like another of my rants but so be it, and this is just as much for me as anyone else to get off my rear and do something. The time is now

Thoughts

Due to some recent conversations I have been doing a lot of thinking about life in general and where I am at in it and how are things going. I know a lot of what I am about to write sounds like I may be denying certain events going on or that I am just plain out of the loop but I do not think so. First my own life I often look at my life and feel like man nothing is going right everything is so screwed up and let life get me down, but recently I have tried to change that by identifying what is really a problem and what is perceived. One of the first things I noticed is how I let the negative doom and gloomers around me ruin my day by buying into what they say or how they feel and that has to stop because it is making me miserable. So how do I fix it? Well I have decided for everything they say negative to inject a little positive thought into the conversation and maybe just maybe I will change their day instead of them changing mine. I have also been having a real tug on my heart to do something in the social justice area, I see so much going on in the world that needs to be taken care of but we would rather make up problems or blow small things out of proportion and let the starving, sick and homeless fend for themselves. This is something I need to work on myself because as I said I have been looking at how bad I think things are in my life and have been so busy crying over poor little me that I miss the person in front of me that is truly hurting because they have no job, little food, and soon maybe no roof over their families heads. Well I know this has been a ramble and I do not know if anyone even reads this but I had to get it out.

Finally

I have finally taken time to make another post and cannot believe it has been since September that I have put anything up here. So much has been going on with getting the youth ministry started and planning programs and getting to know the kids and their families it seems like everyday has something planned besides my regular job and school. All in all things are going pretty good though and the new wing is about completed at the Church and everyone is ready for that because it means we will have the space we need to conduct all the programs we need to do. These last few months have really given me a chance to look back on how God has truly blessed me and my family even with the surgeries and motorcycle accidents we have a pretty good life and need to be a little more appreciative of what we have, One last thing anyone who reads this please keep those being affected by the fires in California in your prayers I cannot imagine one what it is like to loose everything but just waiting for it to happen and knowing there is nothing that can be done must be even worse. That is some beautiful area out there and now do to what appears to be the lack any decency of one person setting this thing off thousands of acres of Gods creation are destroyed or in jeopardy.

Why is turning it over so hard for me?

I truly want to turn all things over to God and realize my life would be so much easier If I just let Him lead me through it and listen to His direction. I let know many things that are going on in my life like new job, frustrations with son, and all the other stuff that has been going ruin the good stuff for me. This morning looked at my life and saw all the things that had been bothering me; wife's health and surgery recovery, new office opening, sons being a pain, car problems, A/C going out, and school and thought this is to much. After reviewing things things and praying my view changed to this; Wife is healing, the office is doing okay, I cannot change my son, car and A/C fixed. Now I can concentrate of the good things in life like God helping through all the stuff above and look at the blessings he gives me everyday.

A few observations of what I overheard

This past Monday night I was in the ER with my wife and overheard a few things that just made me think about the world we live in. when we first arrived there was an older lady in the bed next to her who seemed be be longing for attention every couple of minute she was calling for the nurse. at first she was a little annoying but as I thought more about it, all she wanted was a little attention and maybe this was the only time she was getting any in life. On the other side was something more disturbing, a young lady who had been in a car accident. Now at first it seemed like just any other accident you may overhear someone talking about but then things changed. the doctor came in and asked the other person there to leave and then let her have it because her blood and urine work showed signs of amphetamines, opiates, and marijuana. He sternly explained to her how he felt about this and how she had not only pt her own life at risk but the lives of all others on the road at risk. He then went on to explain that if it was not for confidentiality reasons he would turn her into the police on the spot. Net there was and elderly lady who was there for various health reasons and was all alone and the issue of her roommates who where young people may be neglecting or abusing her was being addressed. Now I know it may sound like I was being nosy and eavesdropping but my was was pretty much out of it with the pain killers they had given her and only a curtain separates you and the others so it was almost impossible not to hear what was going on. The thing that bothered me most about this is who reached out to these people after they left did the lonely lady find someone to listen, did the accident with drug problems seek help, and did the elderly lady get the care and safe place to stay she needs. I know what I did was say a prayer for each of these people but should of I did more, could of I did more? My final thought is I did what I could and put them in Gods hand and there more can be done for them than I could ever do, now I just pray they let Him help. Oh and by the way my wife is fine.

time to breathe

Well this has been one of those weeks that i thought would never end. With Mary having surgery and getting ready for things at Church this Sunday (first meeting with youth and speaking in service) and to top it all off I started school again. Saturday will be my day to set back and relax maybe study a little but mainly relax and take a deep breathe. I guess it really has not been that bad when all is said I really love doing what I am doing at Church and school helps me clear my mind and exercise my brain a little. so here is to a little relaxation and enjoyment. The picture is my son Nick with his new toy, pretty sweet eh.

I hope life slows down a little.

So much has been going on in my life oer the past year or so it seems like everyday brings change or something else to drain me. Just a little recap. I have had good friends move away, my place of employment for 17 years closed, I started a new job in an office that is just opening my wife has had carpal tunnel surgery and Saturday had an emergency appendectomy, I started as part time youth pastor and in doing so left the the Church I had been working with youth as a volunteer for 7 years and now another school years is starting for me. As I look back on all these things some of them have really wore me down and others have been dreams come true. i have learned a lot from these things about myself and the great people God has blessed with me in my life and also know that what I have gone through is nothing compared to the trials a lot of people face every day. So with all that said I just want a few months of no change and no health issues for my family, I really need the rest.

Like a little kid

Well tonight I have become even more of a kid or maybe on second thought more of a youth director, I bought a Nintendo Wii. I will probably be up until who knows when. On another note my son Nick got a new Ducati motorcycle today pictures of it later.

A day to reconnect and reflect

With today being my first day off while I wait on my new job to start I decided to take some time and just gaze on Gods glorious creation. I found a wonderful park to set in and eat my lunch and just reflected on the things that have gone on over the past few months and found the blessings hidden in them. I now look forward to the future and all the promise it holds and know more now than at anytime in my life that God will see me through anything that occurs.

saying goodbye

Today was the day to tell the youth and the congregation at CUMC that I was leaving and it was a little hard to do. I did find out one thing though and that is keeping a secret in Church is almost impossible most of the kids and a good part of the congregation already new. I will miss seeing them every Sunday but look forward to getting to know my new Church family at Crestview U.B. I just kept reminding the and myself this is not goodbye but I just will not see you as often.

Well is just a little over 1 hour from now I will be leaving this office for the last time. I have been working here 17 longs years and seen some good times and been through some very stressful hard times but we always seemed to survive until now. I though it was apporpriate when I woke this morning that it was gloomy and rainy because that was the feeling I had when I awoke to come here this one last time. So today I say goodbye to a place where I have spent almost 75% of my life, a place that has seen my family grow and a place I have made many friends. Goodbye Lafayette Eye Center goodbye.

Skit Guys in Napoleon Dynamite

This is a great video from the Skit Guys with some help from Napolean Dynamite.

Well it's down to one more day at the place I have worked for the past 17 years. Right now I do not seem to be to sad or upset or anything like that maybe that will change as tomorrow comes or maybe having 3 months to prepare have helped ease the loss. Whatever tomorrow brings I know God will see me through it and Friday will be something fresh and new.

This week could be one of those where I just want to hide under the covers and escape all the gloom and sadness that seems to be around with eye center closing and saying goodbye to CUMC, but I refuse to let that happen. Instead of focusing on all the negatives I choose to look at the positives that are currently going on and the bright future that is ahead. I have a wonderful supportive wife at home, my son has a job, I have a place to go and work after this and I also have a part-time job working with the youth at a local Church. Even though things may look cloudy and rain is in the forecast I know that rain will bring growth to me.

Well today it began. Mary and I where introduced to the congregation at our new Church.. The people seem to be really nice and are ready for this and I hope they will support us as time goes on. Now comes the hard part., Saying good by to our current Church and planning programs and setting up at the new Church. Saying goodbye will be the most difficult part and I started that today telling a few of the leaders and 2 of the youth i am very close to. I will be telling everyone else next Sunday and hopefully that will include the congregation. This is also the last week for my current employer to be open so this has all the makings of being a pretty low week but I know it is all part of Gods plan and I know Gods plan will be the best. The picture is from our mission trip in 2006

Well today I had another talk with the Pastor at the new Curch I will be working at and he seems to be very supportive of the youth program. The future is a little scary but also looking bright. i have a lot of work to do but I look forward to the challenge and meeting the new youth.

well it finally has happened, I have a job as youth director. I have been praying for this for awhile and God has granted me this opportunity and answered my prayers. Leaving CUMC will be hard but God has called me elsewhere and I will follow. I have really enjoyed the last few years there and have learned so much from the youth pastors I have worked under and the other leaders. I have to admit I am nervous about this but I know if I let God work through me I will do fine and the ministry will do fine. So many thoughts are going through my head right now about leadership teams, programs and many other things I can hardly concentrate on anything else. I am ready for the challenge and excited about my and the Churches future.

So what a day it has been. Mary had her carpal tunnel surgery today and has been having a lot of pain and i have been up since 5:30 this morning and feel about dead. This week has been pretty good though even though I found out I will not be getting the YP job at the Church I still have a real good shot at doing a part-time YP at Crestview and even though it would be hard leaving CUMC I feel I need to go where God calls me to be. In reality this would be better for me because it will allow me to fulfill my obligations that I have made for the time being and in the future has the potential to go full time and the extra money will help pay for schooling. Once again god has revealed a little more of His plan to me and it seems to be what is best for me at the present time. another hard part about this is keeping it silent from the kids because i do not want to upset them but as soon as I find out I will seek Gods and good friends direction on how to tell them. Well enough for now I know no one else probably never sees this but it helps me just to type things out and get them out of my head.

Why does God put things on are heart and in are soul and then allow other people block us when we try to use them. what I mean by this is a few years ago I felt Gods call in my life to make Ministry my passion and since then have taken steps to start on getting a degree to appease those who say if you do not have a degree you will never get a job in Ministry. I listened to these people and have twice been past over when opportunities came up at my own church to fill a ministry position always hearing how I had to have 4 years of schooling before I would even be considered. I also want to say at this time it is not everyone who says this but a small group that some how has the ability to influence almost all of the selection committee. I am not even talking about and ordained position, I mainly am talking about the position of Youth Director which I have been working as a volunteer in for the past 7 years and in other setting for about 15 years. My big problem with this is that so much focus is being put on education and not on experience and the ability to relate to people and it seems that the Church some where along the line has decided that we all need to be Theologians and have Doctorates in religion to be able to minister to each other. So what to do now, I guess I will just have to rely on faith and continue to love those around me and show them grace and tolerance, and that you do not learn in any school.

I want to cry but cannot, I want to shout out but cannot, I want to lash out and strike something in anger but cannot. I have no emotion and do not know what I feel or if I can feel anything. How long will this last what will become of me, what will become of my family. God helps us through this time you are the only light in my darkness.

This past weekend I Finally was able to get the breath of fresh air I needed. I was able to visit with some old friends and make new acquaintances and enjoy a wonderful discussion about the Kingdom of God and share what has been going on in my life and my journey with God. I have felt more rested and at ease over the last few days and know it was because I was finally able to get a few things out that I have been holding in for a long time. I once again have a clear picture of what God wants me to do for Him to serve His Kingdom. well that's it for now peace to all and God Bless or should it be Bless God.

Another work week just about over and I am ready for it to end. This has been one of those weeks again with extra stress that is really not needed but I have come to realize that every place has the problems we do and I have started to deal with it a little better. Today I am excited though because I am going to Marion for an Emergent Church meeting at Craig's and staying over to watch the Colts on Saturday. Josh and I will be taking off around 4:15 and I look forward to the discussion on the way their and during the gathering but most of all it will be nice to see Craig and Joy. I am also looking forward to Sunday night, I love playing the music during worship time it really is my time to connect on a different level and that really is what gets me through the week. Well enough for now back to work.

Once again I remind myself that life is not so bad after all. Recently I have been going back to my old ways of worrying about what I felt where significant problems in my life and once I really took time to think them through found them not only to be small but not worth the worry. So what did I learn, with all of it's inperfections and rocky roads my life is pretty darn good and God has truly blessed me and continues to do so.

It has been so long since my last post and life has seemed to be so hetic and at times I just wanted to jump of this ride we call life but it would not slow down enough for me to do so. I was getting in a rut my whole life was work,school and Church every day and night brought something to do but things calmed down and this past month I finally got back to relaxing and seeing the great joys in my life. Mary and I spent a week in California exploring the San Diego area and I spent most of the last four days just walking on the beach and reconnecting with God and myself. That was one area I had really let slip I was so busy with all life was throwing at me I forgot who makes all I do possible and those days on the beach really helped and where needed. So now I move on to a new year refreshed and ready to go but this year I plan on taking more time to enjoy life and all the great gifts it brings. The picture is one I took on the beach in Coronado at the Hotel Del.